1. I’d punch myself in the boob just to see if it hurt as bad as getting kicked in the nuts.
2. I’d thoroughly massage my boob right after though… because it would be sore.
3. I’d finally buy that girls cardigan in XL that I really wanted from Forever 21, but was too embarrassed to buy as a guy….
Now that he has spare time, Brett Favre will hover over his teammates while they’re trying to blog on their laptops. “Hey, cool Tumblr dude, lemme show you how to reblog, hey get that penis shot outta there, not cool man!”
Cam Cardow / The Ottawa Citizen
Would anyone care to join me to be the meat in this sandwich?
Do you use the heated seats to keep your Burger King drive thru warm?
Do you use the AC to cool down your Whopper, because you couldn’t wait to go home to eat it?
Or even worse, are you eating your Whopper in your car because… it is your home?
Do you only use cruise control when you need to retrieve the fries you dropped?
When you think you’ve retrieved that french fry, did you mistakenly pick up a dried french fry from your last visit at Burger King?
![moviesinframes:
Moon, 2009 (dir. Duncan Jones)By diver5ion[More Moon here]](http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l53szxsS9X1qzbykto1_500.png)
Dude, can you pop the hood… I need to get something out of my trunk.
(via brooklynmutt)
The Tea Party’s all like OMG THIS IS A METAPHOR FOR WHERE OUR COUNTRY IS HEADED A PRESIDENT WALKS INTO A BAR GET IT?
